


Show Me This Is Real

by WinterIsComing



Category: The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, I'm Sorry, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Smut, Tags Are Hard, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-30
Updated: 2019-07-30
Packaged: 2020-07-27 01:48:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20037898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterIsComing/pseuds/WinterIsComing
Summary: She went to his rooms to yell at him because he deserved it. Together they set to rebuild Ravka but of course he would break her trust as soon as the opportunity had presented itself.She had went to his rooms to yell at him.She didn't expect to be bent over a desk instead.





	Show Me This Is Real

The oprichniki didn't even flinch, didn't try to stop Alina as she barrelled through the door into the Darklings chamber.

"You bastard! You promised! You promised that you wouldn't hurt him and you did it anyway. I gave up, I stopped fighting you and you did it anyway!" Alina was a flurry of emotions, anger mostly but also hurt. Hurt that she had let herself trust him, foolishly of course, but she had believed her would keep his word if for no one else but for her sake.

News had just arrived that Nikolai had been injured, quite severely, and taken back to their headquarters, a place they wouldn't disclose its whereabouts to Alina in case the information fell into the hands of the Darkling. She hadn't stopped to think then, had simply stormed to his rooms with no real thought of what she might achieve in confronting him.

Silver eyes flicked up to meet her own, a hint of annoyance flashed there before shuttering into their usual impassive mask. He was leaning over a stack of reports on his desk, as usual, hands braced an either side of the offending documents. He hadn't even lifted his head when she had stormed in. Like he had expected such an entrance.

"What, Alina, are you talking about?" He asked her, pulling back from his work to lay the full weight of his attention on her. Those eyes… Focus, Alina.

"You know fine well what I'm talking about!" Light danced at her fingertips. She was angry but she wasn't sure who she was more angry at, The Darkling or herself? She should have expected that he would go back on his word, he had never given her much reason to trust him. But she found she did trust him and this news put their tentative relationship on a knife's edge. "Nikolai, I am talking about Nikolai!"

"Ah. I promised that I would not harm him and I had no intention of doing so. However that promise did not mention what was to happen if he came after me. Pray tell, Alina, what would you have had me do?" At that her light stuttered a little bit. She hadn't expected it to be Nikolai to start such violence. "Your _friends_ seem to think you are a prisoner here. Is there a lock to your door? Are you not free to come and go as you please?"

"I would not call myself free," she spat back but she tasted the lie for what it was.

"You came to me, Alina. You came willingly to stop anymore unnecessary conflict. But it seems your friends do not hold such values." He moved around the desk, the two now dangerously close to each other given the rising tension between them "Do they care not for Grisha? They took out six of my guard. _Six_, Alina. Should I have let the otkazat’sya attempt to kill me too? The boy is lucky he made it out with his life. He is lucky I hold my thoughts of you in much higher standing or he would not have." He was angry too, Alina realised, because they had been attacked on what should have been a simple expedition.

But he was angry at something else… Was it because she thought he had gone against his word to her?

She _had_ come to him. She had come to him after a particularly brutal attack between the Darkling and his beasts and the followers of Sankta Alina. The results had been devastating and Alina couldn't take anymore bloodshed on her account. Nikolai and the others tried to talk get out of it but she came to him anyway. Had appeared to him in the dark of his chambers and simply said she was done running from him and she was. She had left her friends to do what had to be done. They had been working together these past months, Alina sitting in on his war councils and making suggestions. She had not expected to be allowed as much but The Darkling even took her suggestions into consideration. He considered everything carefully and more often than not now seemed to be putting her suggestions into place. Slowly, they were putting Ravka back together. Without the bloodshed.

And it wasn't really hatred that she felt towards the Darkling either. In fact, she'd be lying if she said that were the case. A tentative relationship was being formed in the ashes of all that had come before.

The Darkling had a brilliant mind, which was cunning and clever and dangerous. But he cared, she realised, for a people who had been oppressed for much too long. He would change the world. He just needed some council that didn't result in mass murder. They created a balance together, much as he had always said they would. She always found herself drawn to him in a way she could never explain not even to herself, in a way she'd never felt with another person before. She knew that he felt the pull between them too, she had seen how he had looked at her, but neither of them had seemed prepared to address it. To act on it.

"You truly did not go after them?" Alina asked, anger dimming to near embers. What did she expect of him? To sit by idly and allow Nikolai to strike him? Nikolai was proving to be too bold, too rash. She loved him but she realised he couldn't see past his hatred. He was making too many mistakes and it was going to cost her friends their lives. She would need to try and soothe tensions, make him see she was working tirelessly to achieve a common goal of peace in a war torn country.

"Truly, I did not. But it goes to show how little you think of me to think I would do so after everything we have achieved together." He had went to turn away from her, back to his work, but her hand on his chest stopped him. Alina didn't know why she did it, why she reached out to him, but she couldn't stand the idea of him turning away and believing she thought so little of him. She thought about him constantly. He plagued her nights with thoughts of what could occur if she just let herself feel what she was trying so hard to suppress.

"I don't think so little… I hadn't thought that Nikolai would try to strike. He is making careless choices at the cost of lives because he thinks it is right."

"And yet you care for him." It was a statement, not a question and Alina was sure he was just trying to pull a reaction from her and derail her.

"Of course I do, he is my friend! They all are. I love them."

"And what about me?" That brought her up short. What about him? What was he asking her? He stepped in closer to her and she had to raise her head a little to maintain his eye contact. The space between their bodies seemed to slip away to nothing.

"You are not my friend, Darkling. We won't ever be friends. I do not think we are capable of such things together." His eyes hardened, face starting to shutter into an impassive mask to hide hurt. "But," she went on, moving her hand up to his neck and grazing her fingertips down his pale skin. "I think we are capable of much more powerful things."

She could feel his pulse and that surprised her. She never thought of the Darkling having something as mortal as a heartbeat.

He stared into her face for a moment, seeming to consider her words before his hands moved to touch her lips.  
"This is what you want?"

Alina found she did want this. _This_ was something she had put off time and time again with Mal because the thought of dark eyes and pale skin clouded her mind. She had never told Mal that of course, had merely chalked it up to not being ready and he had believed her although had started to get impatient about it towards the end.

The Darkling had plagued her mind since they had met a lifetime ago in a town at the edge of the Fold, when she had simply been Alina and knew nothing else but Mal.

She wasn't that girl anymore. She was Grisha and she was equal to no other but The Darkling.

"You are what I want."

The tether snapped.

  
He moved his mouth to cover hers in an instant, hungry and aggressive like he had been restraining himself from doing such a thing for a long time. She kissed him back in ernest, thinking back to a dark room at a Fête so long ago when similar things took place between them in the shadows.

He tasted of night and jasmine and something so distinctively him.

Alina's hands tore at his kefta, his shirt, pushing it off his shoulders to pile at his feet and reveal a broad expanse of smooth skin. There were scars on his chest, a few she knew that she was responsible for but felt no guilt. Instead she dragged her nails down his chest across muscled flesh. The Darkling let out a low hiss under his breath and pushed her back, back until her legs hit the hard wood of his desk.

"If only Ravka could see their little Saint now," he said against the skin of her neck. He was leaving a trail of bruises down her neck. He knew the statement it would make.

"If only they could see their Darkling, being taken apart by their Saint. I think I'd be their salvation." Strong hands gripped her thighs and lifted her onto the desk. Her kefta was bunched around her hips as he sank to his knees.

"You are my salvation, Alina."

The Darkling on his knees before her. Saints help her. He was going to ruin her.  
He pulled her underthings down her legs slowly, cool eyes fixed on hers.

"Keep your eyes on me. I want to see you come apart at my hand. I want you to know where I've been, where no other man has been before me." How he had known that she had not given herself to Mal was beyond her but, at that moment, she didn't care because his fingers had started to move and long fingers slipped effortlessly inside her.

The noise that passed her lips was anything but saintly. When his tongue flicked against her core she all but screamed.

"Oh, oh saints," she gasped as he began moving with more urgency. His finger plunged into her brutally before it was joined by a second finger then a third. He was not gentle, this was not a sensual experience between two lovers. This was carnal and all consuming.

Her body wound itself tighter, every nerve in Alina's body was alive, and it took so much of her strength not to let herself fall back onto the desk. Instead, she held his gaze as his tongue and fingers worked her closer to a finale more devastating than any she had ever brought herself to. She was going to come apart, she could feel it, arching her back and wishing for the release he was so brutally pushing her towards.

"Please," she gasped. "It's too much. I can't-" His teeth grazed the sensitive skin between her legs and she was lost. She screamed as release crashed over her, but he kept going in his ministrations, licking and teasing her through the orgasm, drinking in all that she gave him.

When he moved away from her, she was a quivering mess atop his desk and he relished in the sight of her there, never believing he would see such a thing. Never would he have thought he would have her in such a way, although he had certainly thought on the idea. He stood in nothing but his trousers and when Alina started to again focus on her surroundings she saw the straining in his trousers. _Right_.

She sat up on the desk and he helped her out of her clothing. She sat in nothing but her skin on his desk and his steely gaze took in the sight before him. Again he was kissing, fingers twisting into white hair, her own hands moving to open his trousers and push them down his hips. Alina had spent enough time in the first army to know what to expect but he was a lot bigger, she was sure.

Suddenly she felt a little lost and more than a little overwhelmed at this turn of events. She wanted him, that much she knew, but it was the act itself she was uncertain in. How did she bring him close to the pleasure he had just given her? She let her fingertips ghost over the length of him and he shuddered at the touch.

"Alina," his breath feathered across her face as he rested their foreheads together. "Tell me what it is that you want." _Tell me this is what you want._

"I want to feel you. I want to know what it is like, what it would be like between us." He moved between her legs and felt the weight and pressure of his length between her legs, a shuddering breath passing her lips. Slowly he pushed against her, fingers digging into the flesh of her hips.

"This is what you want?" He asked as he pushed in further, stretching her in a way his fingers did not. The feeling was unlike anything she had felt. She could hardly think past the feeling.

"Yes, Darkling." She clung to him and let her head fall onto his shoulder. He was fully inside of her now, and past the slight sting the pleasure was almost overpowering.

"Aleksander," he said to her. "My name is Aleksander." There was a strain on his voice as he worked to stay still while she accommodated him.

She wiggled her hips to get him to move, to give her some sort of friction. "Please, Aleksander," she begged.

And then he moved

It wasn't slow and caressing. It was a demanding pace, bruising and punishing, and Alina began letting out a series of curses and moans as he moved. His strong hands pushed her down onto the desk, one holding her in a bruising grip at her waist and the other giving attention to her nipples. Harder and faster he went and she could feel her body tightening again.

Alina opened her eyes and saw light and dark entwining itself around them. Their powers bonding just as surely as they were. The sight of it only drove her faster towards her impending release. 

This time when her orgasm hit her, Aleksander pulled out and flipped her over, pressing her front against the desk and entered her from behind. This was deeper and she could feel so much more of him. She didn't know how to breathe.

The pace he set was relentless and that coupled with her second orgasm she found she was struggling to focus on anything.

"Alina," Aleksander moaned although it came out more like a gasp. His pace was faltering and she didn't think she had ever seen him so undone, do unravelled before. Alina found that she loved it. Thrusts stuttered and then he was coming inside her, pressing her firmly into his desk while he was thrown so brutally through his orgasm. Soft, warm lips left open mouthed kisses down her back.

The two slid to the floor, Alina settling into Aleksanders lap while they both returned to themselves. Strong arms enveloped her whilst they sat in silence. She had come here to yell at him. Instead she had let him fuck her into a desk and she would be lying if she said she hadn't thoroughly enjoyed the chain of events.

"Tell me that no other has taken you apart like this. Tell me no other has forced you to break your steely resolve." The request was murmured into the smooth skin of his chest while her fingers traced the scars there. She knew exactly the ones she was responsible for. He did too.

"No other but you has ever found their way under my skin. Wanting you has made me weak." He had said as much to her before, that wanting her made him weak. She had once thought the same.

"No, Aleksander, wanting me has done the exact opposite." It was true. Alina had spent so long fighting this, fighting him, that she had been blind to see what was there in front of her. They were the balance. Alone, The Darkling went unchecked and unchallenged. Alone, there was nothing but eternal darkness which would surely be the ruin of Ravka, just as the Fold had. But together…

Together they could set the world right and maybe find a little time for themselves along the way.

"Stand by me. Publicly. Show your people that we are fighting together for a better Ravka. Show them that this isn't an illusion."

She heard the words he didn't say, she didn't have to. _Show me this isn't an illusion_.

"Okay, Aleksander. Let's show them."  
The pairing of the two most powerful Grisha in history. Together they would change the world.

  
For better or for worse.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry.  
There isn't enough smut in this fandom and I find I've got too much time on my hands.


End file.
